Me, Myself, and I

Its amazing how your favorite people in the world can make you happy, mad, sad, pissed, and crazy in love all in just like 15 hours or so :| damn it

That awkward moment when you send a “wrong” text to the wrong person and they’re all “whatever” about it

why does my brain think is ok to fuck things up? i mean seriously my body has a reputation to uphold, and my heart can’t take the stress. oh well its not like life is actually worth living

I’m crying for the first time since i dunno when…..and its over one little thing……..

I need a way to release my emotions and not hurt anyone at the same time, it seems lately thats been a problem of mine……..

Every day I see you there sitting, standing, maybe walking or running. I want to call out to you to just to look into your eyes just to know that your there for me. Everyday you try and make me happy but yet everyday you hurt me more then you can imagine. Everyday I want to tell you how much I love you, how much I care for you, yet every time I try to something in my head stops me, maybe for the better I don’t know. Every day I talk to you my love grows until one day it will burst out and claim you for its own, I know then that at that moment at that time when that happens I will hurt you and everyone around me. Everyday I think about you I imagine what life would be like with you with me or me without you both pain me equally. Everyday whenever I see you the happiest some how it pains me just to see you, maybe I’m a dreamer who lives a life of fantasy who’s reality is but an illusion but some how you aren’t an illusion in my head you make me want to be happy…..I end up hurt instead pained by the knowledge that you’ll never be mine or want to be mine, this is one of the reasons I did what I did